We have probably already had encounters with the persons who are ready to do great and self-sacrifying deeds for others. From their mouth we have frequently heard the word "I am sorry" but we became sad when we realized that their goodness did not stem from love but from the guilt tormenting their conscience. In the depth of their souls, because of their sins, they are not reconciled with God. They have suppressed the awareness of the sin which is the source of their guilt and thus they feel guilty for all that gives them the pretext for that. If they accidentally trip some passer-by in the street, they will not perhaps sleep quietly because of restless conscience.

They do not mean by sin man's spiritual state or his broken community with God, but the lack of care and self-control that results from the undone good deed or done bad deed. Therefore, when they commit a sin, they do not repent the motives they committed the sin (selfishness, pride, irritability, cowardice, absence of love etc.), but for the form of behavior by which they hurt another man or simply violated the established codes of behavior.

Since they do not have the consciousness of God's approval, they try to acquire it from men, before their mundane authorities or their personal conscience, keeping blindly to their codes of behavior. They can be very self-sacrificing, they are ready to set aside from their pockets the great amounts of money for the poor but in all their goodness those persons do not have joy. The joy of divine love is replaced by the worry of pangs of conscience.

They cannot accept themselves as sinful persons which need Christ's justice ascribed to us. When they notice sinful habits and affinities in their nature, they try immediately to correct their state in order to feel righteous before their conscience. They do not permit God to lead them gradually and so they put a burden upon themselves to be faithful toward any demand that comes before their conscience. They try to consume solid food although they are not even in the stage of milk. They do not have confidence in God and His acceptance and therefore they try to save them themselves.

One girl, a student of theology had a load of sadness and darkness on her face. She was different from all other colleagues by her shyness and quietness. And then, at once, she got the light of a nice day in her life.

During the preparations for the next exam with a topic "justification by faith" where all the students and their professor were, the girl asked one question, and received the answer which moved all her being. The professor shouted: "Why is your reaction toward the gift of salvation like as if you had got an atomic bomb? ... Take this gift!" The girl went out with tears on her face and that was the beginning of the new life for her.

A few weeks later students saw in her completely another person and the new preacher of teaching about justification by faith. Her face shone in the happiness of salvation. She understood completely that the salvation is accepted "gratis".

All who, in the light of God's face, saw the dirtiness and distortion of their own characters and cried out to God "Give me that water, and then I shall not be thirsty" have heard His answer:

"When the poor and needy seek water, and there is none, and their tongue faileth for thirst, I the Lord will hear them, I the God of Israel will not forsake them." (Isaiah 41:17)

"And the Spirit and the bride say, Come. And let him that heareth say, Come. And let him that is a thirst come. And whosoever will, let him take the water of life freely." (Revelation 22:17)

THE PRINCIPLE OF REVERSE BEHAVIOR UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF THE FEELING OF GUILT

Let us recall the example of a mother who arouses the maternal feeling of love for her son. The emotion of love which should not represent just the pretext for expressing the real love (not possessed by it), is used by this mother as a driving power. She will be prone to say: "Oh son, I love you so much, I love you too much!"

It is impossible to love somebody too much! What is revealed by this frequent and senseless statement?

In psychology defensive mechanism of reverse behavior is known. If we dislike somebody especially, we are prone to be especially kind and good toward that person in order to appease our unclean conscience by sacrificing deeds or sentimental feelings. Likewise, the mother bearing on herself a burden of guilt because she does not have the real love (patience) for her son, appeases her conscience by provoking and emphasizing her maternal feelings. A young man will emphasize his sentimental feelings for a girl rightly because his conscience warns him that he is with her on account of the selfish motives. Thus a religious person will also arouse his or her fanatical motives and emphasize his or her great love for God.

In order that such a person become aware of his load it is necessary to open the doors of his mind and heart to the action of the Holy Spirit through the correct idea of God's character. Then he will see the difference between the character of his own righteousness and that of God's righteousness.